That First Time

I remember the very first time I ever walked into the infusion area for chemotherapy patients . Everyone looked so frail and thin . . . . so ill . It was a huge room , filled with people . I was astounded to see so many going through chemo . That was the first time , my eyes were opened to the reality of cancer . What you don't see can't hurt you , right ?  Cancer is everywhere , affecting everyone , whether it's your friend , co-worker or relative .

My friend , Jan , became my chemo partner . She would pick me up and stay with me for all six treatments . Sometimes , I would sleep or work on my puzzles or crochet , but each time Jan would get us  lunch while there .

My emotions toward chemo were great . Compared to all I've been through physically , chemo was a piece of cake . . . . at least  that first bout with cancer . I did seem to be so extremely tired while there . Maybe my body was  so worn out from all those surgeries  . . . .

And now ? Well , now the room has become smaller , much more private consisting of no more than three people at a time . I don't have a chemo partner by choice . I find I can face it alone now . The symptoms vary from one type of chemo to the next . With each re-occurence , I have adjusted a little bit more to that acceptance part . My hope is that it will be years before my " next " bout .

Have a Blessed Day everyone .