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Showing posts from July, 2016

The Fakery

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Everyday is a brand new day,
                                                   everyday is a journey.

Am I wrong to be always so happy? 
This world is full of grief;
Yet there is laughter of sunshine, 
to see the crisp green on the leaf,
Daylight is ringing with song-birds, 
and brooklets are crooning at night;
And why should I make a shadow when God makes all so bright?
Earth may be wicked and weary, 
yet cannot I help being glad!
There is sunshine without and within me,
 and how should I mope or be sad?
God would not flood me with blessings,
 meaning me only to pine
Amid all the bounties and beauties he pours upon me and mine;
Therefore I will be grateful, 
and therefore will I rejoice;
My heart is singing within me; 
sing on, O heart and voice. --Walter C. Smith.

I laid around for what seemed like hours after turning off the alarm. I always set the time for an hour earlier than what I need to just for this purpose. It was so dark and it stayed dar…

Highlight Of The Week #21

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Everyday is a brand new day, everyday is a journey.

Though waves and storms go o'er my head,
    Though strength and health and friends be gone,
  Though joys be withered all, and dead,
    Though every comfort be withdrawn,
  On this my steadfast soul relies,--
    Father! Thy mercy never dies.
JOHANN A. ROTHE.

These past weeks have been serving more of a dual purpose. Either it's a good day or a bad day kind of experience. Believe me, I couldn't wait for my last chemo, knowing that at least this part of my treatment would soon be over. It is a great comfort to know only a few more weeks and my life can go back to normalcy as soon as possible. 

I'm more than ready for the next chapter to begin. I know that purpose I was searching for is waiting for my complete recovery. That will involve many changes, but I believe these changes are both necessary and welcome. Change is good. 

It's funny how my life, looking into the future,…

A Health Update

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Everyday is a brand new day,
                                                        everyday is a journey.

The last thing I wanted to do was to get up early for an appointment with my radiation doctor. As much as I love him (he laughs at all my jokes) I felt extremely tired and wanted to lounge around at home. Something I do everyday. 

The weekend before, which was also the week of my last chemo, we all drove to Springfield for a Christmas in July family get together. As nice as it was, it did wear me out. It seems I've been laying around all week recuperating.

As I sat in Dr. H. office, I kept yawning secretly wishing I was at home. All in all, he did give me some good news. I have to do a Ct. scan and come back for a Sims. I have an idea of what that is, but I'm not sure I can explain it well to all of you. If everything comes back good, I might only need two weeks of daily radiation instead of five. I was so happy I alm…

Throwback Thursday

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Everyday is a brand new day,                                             everyday is a journey.   Here we are on another Throwback Thursday where we take a look back in the year 2013 and provide an update on where we are now. I felt very sad after reading this post. We were a group of 5 back then who were fighting cancer. Right now, there is only the two of us and I haven't seen him for a long time.  I know many people who have had a cancer scare or were dealt that card in life. When people have trials such as these, they cling to others who went through the same thing. There is an understanding between us that doesn't require any words. Expressions are enough.
Even though there were the five of us during this time, each of us were at a different level of acceptance. One of us, never accepted and struggled until the very end. Storms From The Past   The week began with the depressing news of Linda's friend (who also has cancer) in …

Becoming A Mary

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Everyday is a brand new day,
                                                   everyday is a journey.


There is a story of Martha and Mary in the Bible. A story of two sisters who couldn't be more opposite in nature. One day, they were entertaining Jesus in their home. Mary, sat by His feet listening to all He had to say while Martha ran around absorbed in details of having such an important visitor in their home. Martha became very angry with her sister for not helping.

I am a Martha. I can quickly become involved in the busyness of life. It took me a long time to understand why Mary was the better person here. Mary took the time to spend and learn from Jesus while Martha was too busy being lost in all the details. Martha missed out on quite a lot by her own doing.

This morning, as I again headed to my bed with my coffee and toast, I had a sort of an epiphany. You see, here I am provided an opportunity to take it easy and rest. Yet, …

Not What I Expected

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Everyday is a brand new day,
                                                       everyday is a journey.

I have learned, as days have passed me,Fretting never lifts the load;And worry, much or little,Never smooths an irksome road;For do you know that somehow, always,Doors are opened, ways are made;When we work and live in patienceUnder all the cross that's laid. --Unknown.

When I first made the decision to go ahead with this treatment, which involved surgery, I sublimely made grand expectations. I knew that I would have difficulties dealing with the idleness of recovery. Therefore, I concocted a list of activities that I could do sitting down. This list consisted of all the things I've wanted to accomplish, but never had the time. It was an ambitious list, but not a realistic one. 

You see, back then, I was thinking like a healthy person and not like a person with an illness.  That same list was tore down just the other day…

Work Of My Hands Pt.2

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Everyday is a brand new day,
                                                       everyday is a journey.

A while back, I wrote about a project I have been working on since last year for both of my children.Talk about working my patience and my abilities. This project has worn out any personal capabilities I may have felt I had. It has tested me beyond measure. I've unraveled and unraveled this project so many times that I've stopped counting after five. The project became more of an ordeal as I struggled with it every step of the way.

Well, I'm glad to report it's done. Finally! Or at least one of them. Will they like it? I certainly hope so. It was one of the biggest projects I have ever undertaken. 



Here it's spread out, hopefully at least a queen size in the popcorn design stitch. It's meant to be for their bedroom as a bedspread. I would love to see it on their bed for the whole effect.



Here is the afgha…

Throwback Thursday

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Everyday is a brand new day,                                      everyday is a journey.   Here it is another Throwback Thursday in the year of 2013 where we provided an update on where we are now.  Nothing has really changed since the post below, except that Linda has passed away already a year and a half ago. Chemo is chemo and the symptoms are the same symptoms more or less. This year we've added another surgery, plus fixed the beginnings of a hernia, tried hormone treatments and added radiation to the mix.  All in all, I'm doing much better than some all with God's Grace. I guess, He isn't done with me yet. Or I should say, I still have more to do here!The Good, The Bad, The Ugly   Chemotherapy: Good ole chemo. There are more varieties and side effects than there are flavors of ice cream. Google any type of chemo and a long list appears of do's and don'ts. I have been extremely lucky with my chemo. During these three …

Growing Pains

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Everyday is a brand new day, everyday is a journey.

We all have a daily routine whether we actually acknowledge it or not. We all think we are spontaneous in our behavior, but in reality, we're pretty predictable. When you share a home with others, one develops a routine of sorts dividing the daily chores between the two of you. 

Anytime there is a disruption in that routine, it affects the natural flow of the household no matter how minor. Just imagine a couple of months of disruption and you can be sure tempers will flare. I feel that Emily and I are at that point now. We just have been together too much and need a break from one another.

Easier said than done! How does one try to fit into another routine  after such a long established one?

The month of May was spent in togetherness. I mean, it was only on the weekends that we shared supper together. Suddenly, we were able to enjoy a meal and evening time . . . . every single day. 

The month …

The Nephew

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Everyday is a brand new day,
                                                      everyday is a journey.

For many years, girls ruled this family. Joey, for instance, was the only boy for over seventeen years before another male was born into this family. I had nieces, but no nephews. 

Since then, it was almost like an avalanche of boys. We went from one (Joey) to Logan, Luke, Timothy, Justin, Ashton, Lachlan and Kai. I hope I didn't miss anybody.They range from 15 yrs. old to 2 1/2 and I'm sure we're not done!

One of these boys, my second nephew, is a miniature of his father (my younger brother) in every way. When he graces your presence, he cannot stop worming nor talking for a minute. He's vivacious, talkative, cannot keep still, ants in his pants Luke! You have to give this boy something to do.

While visiting my mom (his grandma) he came over during his Summer vacation to hang out. It was then that I figured we nee…

The Elliptical

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Everyday is a brand new day,
                                                      everyday is a journey.

I cannot do it alone,
The waves run fast and high,
And the fogs close chill around,
And the light goes out in the sky;
But I know that we two
Shall win in the end--God and I.
--Unknown

When we first moved into our apartment in 2011, we went searching for some sort of exercise equipment we could workout without leaving the place. We finally made a decision on an elliptical machine we could assemble at home. It came in like a thousand pieces which I promptly put together. Yes, you heard me. I put it together. Even now, I cannot believe I did that. It took me several days, but I finished it. 

We used that poor thing or at least Emily did, on a regular basis. For five years that machine stood in my bedroom proudly displaying my technique of putting things together. I was very proud of that machine. 

Alas, just the other day, it stopped work…

That Embarrassing Thing

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Everyday is a brand new day, everyday is a journey.

I cannot do it alone,
The waves run fast and high,
And the fogs close chill around,
And the light goes out in the sky;
But I know that we two
Shall win in the end--God and I.
--Unknown

I have written on many aspects of cancer, but I've never really written about one of my biggest side effects affecting me during this treatment. It's not a very pleasant topic, actually more of an embarrassing one. 

Ever since my surgery, I'm having much difficulty going to the bathroom. I understand the fact that things need time to go back to normal. I also understand the fact that I'm having chemo, but somehow, I expected things to be better. If it isn't constipation, then it's diarrhea or inflammation of the hemorrhoids. Lord, there is nothing worse!

I can deal with anything and Lord knows I've done so, but this is horrible. There is no relief. One ends, the other begins. Just when one fe…

Interesting Days

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Everyday is a brand new day, everyday is a journey.


When you get into a tight place, and everything goes against you till it seems as if you couldn't hold on a minute longer, never give up then, for that's just the time and place that the tide will turn.
--Harriet Beecher Stowe.

"Well, here's to another difficult day," I said.

"It's not difficult, just interesting," replied Emily. 

Funny perspective on things, one we should adopt. Somehow, it's difficult to do when things are falling apart. We all know the cliches, "the domino effect" and "when it rains it pours." Even so, I figured I would adopt Emily's attitude toward the current developments around here.

So how can we turn things around in a positive way? Well, all this provides new material for my blog. Plus, no matter how painful it may be, we do learn from it. We know there is a light at the end of the tunnel. 

I'm almost a…

Simplicity In Itself

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Everyday is a brand new day,
                                                    everyday is a journey.

A few weeks ago, I had the privilege of meeting up with my mentor friend from Texas. I have such a beautiful history with her as she was the one who Baptized me back in 2008. We have come a long way since those first few years of our spiritual journey. We hung out together, exercised together, went to bible study and sat side by side in Church as two single mothers. She was my buddy and my date for many of Church functions where couples reigned.

You have no idea how devastated I was when she upped and left for Texas in one gigantic and bold swoop! That's Anna, never afraid to step out and take a chance. It took a long time to accept her move. I was so happy for her, because her life changed forever for the better with that one risky decision. Life is very good for her in Texas.  Yet, I still missed her and the relationship we sha…

The Purpose

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Everyday is a brand new day,
                                                       everyday is a journey.

Weary of myself and sick of asking
What I am, and what I ought to be,
At the vessel's prow I stand, which bears me
Forward, forward, o'er the starlit sea O air-born voice! long since severely clear,
A cry like thine in my own heart I hear.
Resolve to be thyself: and know that he
Who finds himself, loses his misery. --Matthew Arnold.

The last few weeks were the very first where I actually felt bored and restlessness. Nothing held my interest for very long. I wandered from one activity to the next looking for something, but what was that something? Even with food, nothing satisfied me and yet I wanted it all. 

I knew this day would come where the existence of an idle life would reign and boredom would set in. I love being active, the idle life is not for me! There is nothing worse than wandering from room to room searching for th…

Throwback Thursday

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Everyday is a brand new day,                                      everyday is a journey.   Here we are at yet another Throwback Thursday where we take a peek into the year 2013 and provide an update on where we are now. There are so many "firsts" in life and sometimes, these firsts are repeated over and over again. Yet, each time I've experienced that particular first, it held a different emotion, thus becoming another first. Even though, I don't have a chemo partner any longer, I would suggest others to have one especially if it's your first experience with chemo. That chemo partner serves a tremendous purpose. Not only do you not worry about transportation, but they provide help with appointments, picking up medications and refreshments.  Another word of advice if anyone is interested in becoming a chemo partner. Be ready to stay the majority of your day there, bring along some food or drinks and something to keep you preoc…

Simply A Linen Closet

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Everyday is a brand new day, everyday is a journey.


To keep young, every day read a poem, hear a choice piece of music, view a fine painting, and, if possible, do a good action. Man's highest merit always is, as much as possible, to rule external circumstances, and as little as possible to let himself be ruled by them.
--Goethe.

It has been quite a few months since I have continued on with my simplification project. My energy levels hit an all time low and all I wanted was to sleep. Cleaning out and de-cluttering the last thing on my mind. Not to mention all these doctor appointments. 

So this time around I wanted to tackle the linen closet. As you can see it isn't utilized properly and very disorganized. 
I believe one of the problems happens to be that we buy in bulk majority of our products. This is something that is very economical and I would love to continue in doing, so we have to make this work.
Just looking at it makes one want …

Throwback Thursday

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Everyday is a brand new day,                                      everyday is a journey. Here we are at another Throwback Thursday taking a look at the year 2013and providing an update on where we are now.  I laugh to myself every time I re-read a post  concerning reducing the cancer list. I have spent these past nine years keeping my body as healthy as possible, following all the politically correct cancer "to do" list. I have given up so many things and I still get "helpful suggestions" from other people. But, this post isn't about my gripes! This blog exists to help others with the cancer process. Even I STILL learn from this journey. I do wish I posted where the article came from. 10 Ways The article read:
10 Ways To Reduce Your Cancer Risk

   Over the years, I have been given many suggestions on how to prevent my cancer from coming back. People have bought me teas, made certain vegetable dishes, ordered special oils to …

Life Without A Car

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Everyday is a brand new day, everyday is a journey.

what is rightly done stays with us, 
to support another right beyond,
or higher up;
whatever is wrongly done vanishes;
 and by the blank,
 betrays what we would have built above.
--John Ruskin

 I sat at my desk, eating my toast and drinking a cup of coffee watching the perpetual drizzle of rain. Off in the distance a roar of thunder could be heard with an occasional flash of lightening. Well, that's it for my plans for this morning. 

Not having a vehicle really puts a damper on things. One becomes a slave to the weather, to other people, to the schedule and happenings of other things. It's called dependency. Suddenly, I'm no longer free to do what I want, when I want it and for how long I want it.  

The more I stared at that rain, the bigger my situation appeared. Feeling overwhelmed by everything, a small cloud of fear enveloped me as I thought in dread of all the appointments I …

Up The Creek With No Paddle

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Everyday is a brand new day, everyday is a journey.


Just to let thy Father do
    What He will;
  Just to know that He is true,
    And be still;
  Just to trust Him, this is all!
    Then the day will surely be
  Peaceful, whatsoe'er befall,
    Bright and blessed, calm and free.
F. R. HAVERGAL.The above poem couldn't be more truer than these past couple of weeks and above all, today. It was a typical morning, nothing special. For a long time, I've been looking for a purpose feeling a little out of sorts with more time on my hands than I wanted. This morning, we've decided to go explore an idea for a new purpose in our lives. I cannot tell you more than that for now. It being right after a holiday, we figured it was a perfect opportunity for our secret adventure as many people returned to work. Well, we didn't get very far, maybe a full fifteen minutes into the ride. All of a sudden, I felt like I ran over something, ev…

A Quiet Fourth

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Everyday is a brand new day, everyday is a journey.

Serene will be our days and bright,
    And happy will our nature be,
  When love is an unerring light,
    And joy its own security.
W. WORDSWORTH.

So very quiet. I can't remember the last time there was such silence around here. It's almost uncanny. Even though we live in an eight unit apartment building, we're located right smack in the middle of a residential area of single family dwellings. It is very normal to hear the sounds of children running and playing, especially during the Summer months. On the weekends, the sidewalks are filled with people walking their dogs, children biking with their parents or neighbors cutting their lawn. There's always some commotion outside.

It's not exactly a quiet street as people live and enjoy their surroundings. It's one of my favorite things to do is to sit by my picturesque window and write, especially very early in the morning watching the world as the day unfold…