Not In The Mood

 Last week , during my difficult time at work , a comment was made to me that sliced right through my heart . It's always from someone whom you don't expect to behave or say things like that .

Let me explain something to you : I may write about my cancer but you won't see me talking about it day to day . No matter what I feel nor how I feel , I go to work , I teach sunday school , visit my friends . I put on a smile , grit my teeth and move on . I don't sit there , woe is me  . . . . only to Emily . She hears it all . This blog is my forum . . . . my voice . This is where I cry out .

So I'm drudging through the week , my feet aching and my body hurting . It was not a good week for me and I couldn't wait for it to be over . That Thursday , I just couldn't smile any longer . I looked like I felt .

So this person says to me . . .
Put on a smile .
I'm not feeling well .
Yeah, I understand , the people and the work can get to you .
It's not that . I haven't been feeling well with my chemo ....
I know , you're just not in the mood .
Cancer is not a mood !

I'm sorry , but I snapped that the last sentence . Why are we , as humans , so lacking in compassion . I know , that person just doesn't understand . I'm not even upset directly with them , it's just that society has the wrong impression  of chronic illness .

When people think of chronic illness , they imagine a person lying in the hospital . The fact is , there are many people going to work and trying to lead normal lives while dealing with a chronic illness . They're in pain and not feeling well . We need to educate others about us .

This past Sunday , Doug's wife , approached me with an idea that Doug has been mulling over for awhile . He wants to start a group at Church for people living with a chronic disease . I couldn't be happier . I think it's time to go a step farther . . . . let's bring it to the people .

Have a Blessed Day everyone .


  1. Wonderful idea. So sorry for the lack of sensitivity to you when you were hurting. We need to approach people with self-control and kindness. We never know what the other person is carrying around with them...


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