Day 9

It began as another normal night after work. I came in, took off my shoes and coat. I looked around for a plate on the stove, but there was none, so I made myself a jelly sandwich.

In the morning, my drill sergeant Emily, informed me that I've cheated. Cheated? How? Jelly is nothing but sugar, just another form of something sweet. Yup, without even realizing what I was doing, I ate sugar.

That depressed me so much. I was so proud of myself for keeping this up and not giving in. I suffered through countless mornings of bad, unsatisfying coffee for nothing!

So what are you going to do now? The sugar police I'm living with wanted to know.

I'm going to admit it here on this blog and continue on. Disappointed. Not in a good mood, but I will move on.

Which brings me to my next point. All last week and this week, I have been a total grouch! Almost bitchy at times. When I began this sugar quest, the last thing I wanted is to name it a " fast" or something similar.

The minute I take on a cleanse or a fast, a tsunami hits and everything goes to hell. Yes, I said it. Remember the last time? The phone, the car, the computer ? This is no different, except it has hit me on my emotional side.

We, as women, turn to food for comfort when we are stressed or emotional, particularly something sweet like chocolate. It is no wonder that I am at my worst right now. The things that would soothe me in the past are no longer available to me. I can't even crochet right now, because of the lack of time.

Even preparing a meal for myself doesn't evoke any pleasure. My bowl of oatmeal stared up at me this morning, looking very boring. I didn't even want to eat it. The sugar police walked into the kitchen and took one look at my miserable face. She walked over to my bowl, added some butter, milk and a sprinkle of cinnamon.

It did taste a little better.

Have a Blessed day everyone.