Thinking Positive

Think positive. You have to think positive. Be positive.

Lord, how I detest hearing that phrase. People automatically assume since I have cancer that I'm emotionally fragile. Just my saying the word cancer to someone ends usually with a lecture on how I need to stay positive.

The fact that I can speak casually about cancer should tell others that I have dealt with that monster. It seems to be a taboo word for everyone except me.

Friends, I am fine regarding my illness. If I bring up my cancer with anyone, it's more to prepare myself for what is coming. I am trying to incorporate my disease into my lifestyle. I want to live as normally as possible. For that to happen, I will bring cancer into the conversation.

Besides, why are people so afraid of even saying that word? There is no power in the word alone. The power lies when we allow the word to take control over us. I decide how cancer will fit into my life. I have come way too far to allow cancer to run me.

So can I speak openly and freely about how this affects me? Can I discuss my plans with you without someone telling me to stay positive? Can I please cry when I need to?

Trust me, if something does creep up regarding my feelings towards cancer, I will deal with it, probably on these pages.

Friends, if I cry , it's only for a minute to let loose some emotion. If I voice it, it's just to let you know how I'm doing. It's not because I gave up. I will not ever give up.

Have a Blessed day everyone.