Friday, December 9, 2011

What's In A Name

    A transformation has taken place in my life this week . That last chemo where I didn't want to go , really changed me . On my first journey , I realized how many people  truly loved me . This time , I'm learning to love myself . Just think of all the compliments we get and don't take them at face value . We are shown how much we are appreciated or loved  but somehow we just don't believe that it's  true . People are just being nice . That's what we tell ourselves .
  How we see ourselves is so different to how others see us . Emily and I play this game where we name the characters in a particular movie we are watching with real people in our lives . We have fun with it and we end up enjoying the movie more . We have done the same thing with the people in our apartment building . We gave them nicknames based on how we perceive them to be . We have an Easy Ryan , Smokin Steve , Drama Man , Baby Mamma , Big Bird and the Newlyweds . Just by the names you can tell something about them . We wondered , one night , what nickname would they give us ? We called ourselves the laughing hyenas .
   Even  this blog . Or at least the name of it  . Where did it come from ? People ask me that all the time . I have no idea . I've mentioned this before , I see nothing enjoyable about this journey . In fact , I keep telling myself the joy of it will be later on ....that I can't see it right now . It was like that the first time , too .I was so afraid that I would miss the message that God wanted to send me .
  I want to see myself the way that Christ sees me and hopefully everyone else will , too.
  

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