Simply The Little Things

                            Everyday is a brand new day, everyday is a journey.

 Deep-rooted customs, 

though wrong,

 are not easily altered; 

but it is the

duty of all to be firm in that

 which they certainly know

 is right for them.
JOHN WOOLMAN.

Have you ever had a day where nothing really worked out for you the entire day? A day where you walked into work to a huge pile that should have been done by the person before you. Or you come home to a sink filled with dishes and the laundry overflowing. You make yourself a cup of coffee only to discover you ran out of creamer.

Sometimes, it feels as if we are constantly running on empty with a perpetual dark cloud over our heads. It's difficult to be appreciative when we are dumped on by the universe. In fact, it's difficult to even see the good, because all we see are the things gone wrong.

The Joy is in the little things.

One hears that all the time, but do we really understand what it means? The little things. When a hard day or week is lived out, what brings you relief? The comfort of taking off one's shoes upon arriving at home. The peace and sanctity of our home. A cuddle from your furry friend. A cup of tea to calm the nerves. How about that drive thru on the way home? A nice hot shower and a good nights sleep. 

All of these things are priceless when we are bone tired and weary minded. There is truly Joy in the little things. Where would we be without them? I was reminded of these simple Joys this very day as I headed off to the salon for a much needed haircut. As I sat there I could feel the stress of the day wash away while she combed, cut and practically massaged my head. I closed my eyes and realized how soothing something so simple  felt. I left feeling somehow renewed and refreshed with a new haircut. 

I left smiling and happy. Was it Joy that I was feeling?

I think sometimes we need to be reminded of all the simple pleasures around us that cost practically nothing, but time. Time for us to literally stop and bask in them. To acknowledge they even exist. Don't rush by on  Monday morning looking for that Friday. Take a moment to appreciate where you are at and enjoy the simple things in life. 

Have a blessed day everyone. 

Living Life After Cancer

  

      Everyday is a grand new day, everyday is a journey. 

And, as the path of duty is made plain,

  May grace be given that I may walk therein,
    Not like the hireling, for his selfish gain,
  With backward glances and reluctant tread,
  Making a merit of his coward dread,--
    But, cheerful, in the light around me thrown,
    Walking as one to pleasant service led;
    Doing God's will as if it were my own,
  Yet trusting not in mine, but in His strength alone!
J.G. WHITTIER.

So you're all done with your treatment, what now?

I have seen more broken people after cancer than during. You may find that strange, but just think about it. First, you are diagnosed and majority of the time, decisions are made almost immediately about what to do next. At least, health-wise. Then there is the surgery where something is removed like a breast or uterus or ovary or both. For some, chemo or radiation follows. Then we are pronounced in remission and sent on our merry way to enjoy the rest of our life. All of that can last 3 to 6 months of our life.

When did you have time to process any of that? 

Usually, we are still back there in the doctor's office hearing the dreaded word cancer. Everyone is rejoicing at our kicking cancer's butt except us. In our minds we are like what just happened?

The next several months, I believe are the worst. We look in the mirror and see someone different. We are not familiar with this person. Sometimes, our appearance has changed and we struggle with it. Internally, we are forever changed. Everyone is telling us how we should feel lucky to be alive, but somehow, we just can't. 

What is happening here?

This moment here involves speaking through your feelings. Many should go into counseling, join a cancer group or even start a journal. Record and share your experience, in another words process. We have to relive it, experience it and accept it. Accept it. This happened to me and it sucks. It was painful and unfair and traumatic, but you got through it! 

Remember that! You got through it and now you are stronger for it. Give yourself some grace. It will take time, a lot more than you think so be patient with yourself. It's okay, because healing (all healing) takes time. Breathe in, breathe out. One day at a time. Next thing you know a few months have gone by and you realize there have been days where everything seemed just right. Give yourself some grace and absorb all you can. You'll be okay so go out there and live your life . . . again.

Have a blessed day everyone.

Setting Goals Post Cancer

                            Everyday is a brand new day, everyday is a journey.   

 In the bitter waves of woe,

    Beaten and tossed about
  By the sullen winds that blow
    From the desolate shores of doubt,
  Where the anchors that faith has cast
    Are dragging in the gale,
  I am quietly holding fast
    To the things that cannot fail.
WASHINGTON GLADDEN.

How important are goals in your life? There was a time where there were nothing, but goals in mine. I had the monthly goals, the next year goals and even a five year plan goal. Do they help you in achieving them?

 I often wonder that point, because to me, mine were more like dreams. I would not only set them, but dream about them quite regularly. I had these scenes playing out my version of how they would be achieved. Very funny now, because somehow, it never quite happened in that fashion. All of that dreaming helped ease the waiting. 

Cancer sort of put a stop to planning anything. I couldn't even see the month ahead, that's how uncertain things were back then. Either I was in remission or coming out of remission and these two played a huge part in my lack of setting goals. Reaching 50 was something I couldn't even imagine and when that happened, I was at a loss at what to do next. 

At that point, goals have come to a bittersweet end. When life is uncertain, goals can become extinct and living each day as it comes becomes the norm. We evaluate the things that are so important to us. Of all the goals we have spent our life making, it's all the minor ones that mean so much. 

It's that relationship that never flourished or the sunset one never saw. A favorite movie we meant to watch and a trip that never began at all. What's important to you?

It's been 14 years since that faithful day in May of 2007. My goals or lack of them have changed as I entered one season after another. I have seen many of my friends and acquaintances pass on. That experience changes a person and how they look at life. I don't ever want to forget where I was in May of 2007 or even before. If we are honest with ourselves, the time before our illness was not exactly pleasant. I bet there were many issues that may have left you feeling bitter, angry and disappointed. Then your health faltered and chronic illness entered your life crippling you in many ways. 

Do I set goals? Yes and no. I dream of certain things, because I am a very hopeful person. I dream of living in a Tiny House one day, but it's okay if I don't. I dream of traveling through the fifty states, but I will be fine without it. 

My goals are more of a daily thing now. I want to make sure I live gratefully for each and every day. I want to make sure I appreciate all the little things that are done for me. I want relationships with people. More importantly, I never want to forget what God has done in my life. That's what I strive for when I get up and it's not always easy. Some days, it can be extremely difficult and I even fail at times, but I never give up trying. 

Have a blessed day everyone. 

Winter Wonderland

 

                               Everyday is a brand new day, everyday is a journey.

He leads me where the waters glide,

 The waters soft and still, 

And homeward He will gently guide

 My wandering heart and will.
J. KEBLE

I've always loved a good Winter scene, especially the very first one of the season. In my mind, I imagined a real blizzard. I would be sitting at home where it was comfy and warm while the blizzard came down heavily. More like lounging on the couch crocheting away the night. That's how the scene unfolded in my imagination. 

Reality was different. That first blizzard always happened while I was at work and I would have to trudge carefully on the road, holding tightly onto the steering wheel. There would be snow drifts or icy roads and white out conditions. I would drive slowly, praying all the way, being grateful upon arriving home.

Things never really turn out the way we plan them or imagine them in our head. I'm sure that eventually that Winter scene will play out accordingly. Most likely at a time when I least expect it years down the road. It always amazes me how we romanticize situations to make them more appealing in our mind. To cope with? Perhaps.

You may wonder why I'm writing about Winter in August? Well, it may surprise many people to know I actually like Winter. I look forward to it and the slow tempo of life. Winter is usually spent indoors, reading books and crocheting under a warm, comfy blanket. After spending an active Summer and Autumn, I find it relaxing to be still. It feels almost like a resting period before the activities pick up once again. 

So here we are in August, one of my more busier months and I'm  reminiscing about stillness. No matter how much we may enjoy work, we all love a good rest now and then. I guess that's what Winter is to me.

Have a blessed day everyone. 

Continuing On

 

                                Everyday is a brand new day, everyday is a journey.

No star is ever lost we once have seen,

We always may be what we might have been.
Since Good, though only thought, has life and breath,
God's life--can always be redeemed from death;
And evil, in its nature, is decay,
And any hour can blot it all away;
The hopes that lost in some far distance seem,
May be the truer life, and this the dream.
A. A. PROCTER

August, so far, has been extremely busy. As crazy as it may have been, I THRIVE and come alive in the busyness of it all. I love seeing my calendar filling up, but only with the things I love to do. This thing work, well, it interferes with my life. 

When the year began, I told myself I would live out my day as fully as possible. We have spent all of 2020 living in fear, isolation and for us essential workers. . .. overworking. Don't get me wrong. I know myself and I am the first person to raise my hand when there is a need whether that involves work or not. I do that for two reasons: One, I feel there is an opportunity for me to make extra money for the future. Two, my spiritual gift is giving and my hand goes up automatically when there is that need.

My goal for this year meant letting go of 2020 and facing this year wholeheartedly. I filled up that calendar on purpose. I went back into the world. We are not meant to be alone. We are not meant to live in fear. We need rest, all of us. When I see that we could be reverting back to where we were a year ago, I find it disheartening. We cannot go on as before, something has to be done. 

So I have decided to embrace living my life to the fullest and that means getting back full time into the Ministry. Crocheting has always been very therapeutic for me in my recovery, especially in mental health. Last year, I found that many charitable organizations shutdown due to covid19. Very disheartening since I totally believe social services need to be open during difficult times. Even then, I still continued to make and donate items to those that accepted them. Now, I want to go full throttle and continue my Ministry attempting to reach even more than before.

The important thing here is that I am ready, more ready than ever before. Since all of my medical tests have been over, with great results, I have charged out of the gate at full gallop. Bring on the yarn, the crocheting hook and let's continue the work God has commanded of me. So am I busy? Oh, yeah! I'm also loving every single moment.

Find what you are good at and use that gift to bless others. So fulfilling and so satisfying. So get out there!

Have a blessed ay everyone. 

So What's Up?

 

                            Everyday is a brand new day, everyday is a journey,

Time was, I shrank from what was right,

From fear of what was wrong;
I would not brave the sacred fight,
Because the foe was strong.
But now I cast that finer sense
And sorer shame aside;
Such dread of sin was indolence,
Such aim at heaven was pride.
J. H. NEWMAN.

Have you ever experienced a blah kind of day where you could not explain your feelings behind it? You just couldn't explain why you were feeling a dread or a black cloud over you. It followed you throughout your day. It stayed there in the crevice of your brain peeking out occasionally. 

So, what's up?

You are typically a mild mannered person who avoids drama or confrontations, but yet, that feeling is there. Lurking. You have no issues with anyone. You place a smile on your face no matter how you are feeling inside. You literally try your best to have a good day.

So, what's up?

Sometimes, I think my body has gone through so much in the last 14 years that the smallest hint of any kind of stress sets me off out of sync. I don't want to face stuff nor deal with stuff. I just want to be. I want my universe to be balanced beautifully. 

So, what's up?

I think we know what is bothering us, the real truth, even if we don't want to admit it. We know. You know. That thing hanging over your head pushing you down at every opportunity. You know what it is, so why not admit it?

So, what's up?

It's okay to say it out loud. Your scared. As old as you may be, you still can feel fear. Being scared doesn't go away, because you're older now. We are human after all and we experience all emotions always.

So now that you know what's up you can relax just a bit. Relax. Take a deep breath. It will be okay. 

Have a blessed day everyone.

A Life Full Of Surprises

 

                      Everyday is a brand new day, everyday is a journey.

What Thou shalt to-day provide,

    Let me as a child receive;
  What to-morrow may betide,
    Calmly to Thy wisdom leave.
  'Tis enough that Thou wilt care;
    Why should I the burden bear?
J. NEWTON.

There are days where one cannot stop from reflecting on this life of ours. Where we have been and where we ended up. The roads we have travelled and with whom. The pain, the joy, the tears, the heartache and the anger. 

We go back within our minds to that time and experience it all over again.

One thing I have learned is that I can control the emotions I feel when that reflective mood takes hold of me. We can spend many pleasant hours reminiscing all the wonderful memories of our life. Not all were pleasant, though. Those kind of memories can place a dark cloud over us that can last days and even weeks. 

Sometimes, just sometimes, we need to flip these negative feelings so they can work for us and not against us. I have spent way too many precious hours full of regrets, but no more. I choose to think of my life as a life lived full of surprises. Yes, some where good and some not, but one thing for sure, it was never dull.

We spend so much time in regret, especially when we become older. We think of all the could haves, should haves and would haves. They don't mean anything now. We need to refuse to live in that past. We were  forgiven by our Lord and Savior, so why do we have such a huge problem forgiving ourselves? And letting go?

No more. When I look back, I am choosing the how.  I will think of my life as full of surprises. I did the best I could at the situations that were presented to me. I made mistakes, some bigger than others, but all of that has made me into who I am today. God's grace and mercy were shown to me. I think it's time for me to forgive myself and let go. 

Forest Gump was right. Life is like a box of chocolate, one never knows what your gonna get. 

Have a blessed day everyone.