I love to think that God appoints
My portion day by day;
Events of life are in His hand,
And I would only say,
Appoint them in Thine own good time,
And in Thine own best way.
A. L. WARING.
Disappointments are like tiny scars that ache with pain. That scar can become a scab, but we constantly are picking at it causing it to bleed and reopen all over again. It's hard to let go of disappointment, especially when that disappointment comes from loved ones. We all have experienced these disappointments.
I know how I am, how I deal with these setbacks. Talk about negativity city! Suddenly, in my own mind, I cannot do anything well. I am the worst mother. The uncaring daughter. The failing and unsuccessful worker. I'm way too fat and way too unattractive. No one wants to read my gibberish. I'm not good at anything.
These are the lies that we tell ourselves when disappointments occur. The devil knows us really well and he knows how to hit below the belt. He knows what will make us bleed.
I think this is the worst thing. You see, disappointments will happen. They are a part of life as morning and night. How we deal with them makes all the difference in how we see ourselves. Seeing my own self worth is a lot harder when our feelings are hurt and we can only see the dismal grey.
I am so guilty of this. I can sit here and preach, but only this past Friday, I went through my own pity party. I wallowed all day at work at how unworthy I am. The disappointment that caused these feelings was long forgotten as negative thoughts took over. It was like a cancer spreading throughout my body. By the time I got home, I had to yell out STOP! Enough already! Be still!
I spent majority of the night, listening to my preacher podcasts as I crocheted. I could slowly feel the tension leave. The disappointment was still there, but the negative erosion wasn't. We have to nip this quick, folks, before this eats away at our souls. I am a work in progress.
Have a blessed day everyone.
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