Day 64 Of Writing: Where Are You At?

                                                 Everyday is a brand new day, everyday is a journey.




We take with solemn thankfulness
  Our burden up, nor ask it less,
  And count it joy that even we
  May suffer, serve, or wait for Thee,
    Whose will be done!
J. G. WHITTIER

During this twelve year period, I have encountered a multitude of emotions in regards to my cancer journey. I've tried to work on these matters as they came, at times unexpectedly. With each new bout, I had no idea what would emerge from within. People often ask me how I am doing to which I reply just fine.

Just fine. Only two simple words and yet they hold so much feeling. I really haven't had time to address any emotional or mental issues that could have stemmed from my current point of journey.

Physically, everything seems to be going well. My remission is still on. Even my long term side effects seem to be under control. Maybe I have learned how to manage them better. My blood pressure is a bit higher than when I first began this journey in 2007, but still good. My blood sugar has always been borderline and I am hoping to bring it down to a level that won't be such a roller coaster ride.

 I'm also hoping to lose some of my midsection. I've added some simple exercises on a daily basis and have kept a food diary for awhile now. I see my Oncologist twice a year and also have my scans at the same time. Although, I have a new insurance provider and they are not exactly cooperating when it comes to approving any of these scans. We shall see what happens with the one coming up in a few months.

Nowadays, my mind centers around the future. My desire is to make sure I am prepared to handle what comes my way financially and physically. I am currently focusing on making a Will and a DNR. The question that runs through my mind on a regular basis:

What if I can't work anymore? Am I ready for that?

Emotionally, I really haven't been thinking on that subject. I am way too busy trying to fit in as much as I can in my day. I truly enjoy my life and hope to continue doing all that I am doing for as long as I humanely can. Who knows what will emerge when the next time actually comes? Whatever that may be, we will deal with it accordingly. For now, I just want to live my life.

Have a blessed day everyone.