A Year Ago

In the midst of preparing  for my new couch , a little Spring cleaning occurred . A little dusting here , a rearrangement of figurines over there . An old , dirty curtain was taken down and a clean one brought in the morning sun . Small blotches of the brightness hit randomly on the snow covered ground . Spring is almost here .

A year ago , what was I doing then ? Did I feel like today ? Did I feel a change coming on , an acceptance of some sort ? Or did I feel overwhelmed with what was coming ? What was I doing then ? A year ago .

In March of last year , I was preparing to go back to work and a few days before , boils  appeared on my body . I remember now . I remember how hard of a transition it was this returning to work .

What will I feel this time next year ? Will I look back with wonder of how I made it through ? Or disappointment of a broken wish that didn't come true ? A year from now .

I'm feeling nostalgic since my treatment . Sitting here , looking out my cherished window , wondering what this new change I'm experiencing will actually bring . Maybe , it's the slow acceptance that each bout with cancer brings . Acceptance of what the outcome will eventually deliver .

A year ago , I was so happy and secretly wishing . . . . praying . . . that this would be the last time . All those tears I cried a year ago  . .. . all for the sake of this cancerous root that won't be plucked out .

A year ago , I sat here , too . Sat here , looking out my cherished window , wishing everyone a Blessed Day .