Thursday, August 6, 2015

Throwback Thursday

When I came home last night, there was a message waiting from a long time family friend. Her daughter passed away from her long and painful struggle with ALS. As a Christian, I know that she is free from the chains that have held her on this Earth. Still, I am deeply sorry for the mother who is hurting.

Beth (the daughter) and I both were diagnosed with our diseases in the same year  at the same time. While I was 42 yrs., Beth was considerably younger with two small boys. Another friend gone, three this year alone.

As I re-read the story below, I thought of how quickly our lives can change. Yet, we never really get it, do we? Time is so short. When are we ever going to understand and set our priorities for what is important? Some of us never will.


Looking Back
   What a beautiful, sunny day it is!!! A warm, sunny New Year's Eve! Who would have thought it possible. It's ironic that it should be like this. I dreaded this day coming like something awful. The holiday's itself  were very melancholy for me .
   I am a person who likes organization and planning . Before cancer , my whole life was planned out . It has been quite an adjustment living by the seat of my pants , not having control . It is what I wanted , isnt't it ? I wanted to trust God completely with my life . Well , there it is . Be careful what you ask for .
  This year , has started out so promising , so full of rainbows that for a minute I thought I was dreaming . This couldn't possibly be my life , right ? Alot of wonderful things happened to me this past year . My son got married and I gained a daughter-in-law and two beautiful grandchildren . I thank God for Marybeth Fisher sharing them with me .
   As great as the beginning was , all the way up to August , it ended with tower after tower tumbling down . Everything I touched lay in ruins . Talk about being attacked ! Nothing worked . I know what is happening . My faith is very strong . Discouragement just right around the corner . I know I have to wait this out . What more could possibly happen ? I know I am not the one in charge . I can try to manipulate , to alter , to change  anything I want but it won't work without HIS approval .
  As this year comes to a close in just a few hours , I feel  defeated and worn out . All I can do is give myself completely to Him . I can't make anything happen . I can't fix anything . I can only wait upon the Lord to show me where I'm to go .
   I have no idea what will happen in 2012 . I'm not even sure if I can handle it . But I do know that everywhere I do go , it's where I'm supposed to be . Happy New Year Everyone .

Have a Blessed day everyone.

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