Thursday, December 7, 2017

A Toxic Friendship

                                                            Everyday is a brand new day, everyday is a journey.



Let thy day be to the night
A letter of good tidings! Let thy praise
Go up as birds go up--that when they awake,
Shake off the dew and soar.
--Jean Ingelow.



I think we all have had toxic relationships whether they were intimate or casual friendships. I've had both. One of my main concerns and struggles have been in maintaining a personal relationship with women my age. For some reason, they may begin well, but they never end well, especially if they're married.

The problem is, I think, that I'm a very strong character. I don't need a companion to use the ladies room. I have gone to parties without a date. I can eat in a restaurant all by myself. I am comfortable being all by myself. I've become accustomed to handling things all by myself. 

It's also true that everyone handles struggles differently. There are some people who fall on their knees when trials become evident in their lives. They surround themselves with people who love them. Then there are others who hide from everyone and become a recluse. They stop going to Church or seeing anyone from the Church. 

They seek out people who will tell them what they want to hear. I think we lose more friends that way than we know. We don't want to listen to someone who will tell us what might be wrong with us. It's not us anyway, right? It's the other person's fault. No one wants to acknowledge their part in any bad situation. 

A relationship like that usually ends badly. No one in a struggle wants to see another person thriving. Let's really be honest with one another. There are some of us who feel like that towards our friends. We become a bit envious of their joy while we're suffering in the dumps. Slowly our displeasure turns into a silent anger until finally it boils over into a toxic mix of anger and resentment.


You have got to stop letting that person live rent free in your heart.

Jennifer Lee Dukes

How great is that sentence above? She's so right. We just allow things to get so out of hand. We cannot let go of the hurt that this person inflicted in us. Time can go past and we think we're alright. Suddenly, something can evoke a memory of that toxic relationship and we're off once again. 

Oh, I know how that feels. I've been there and done that. I've literally had to erase all evidence of that person or people from my life just so I could spend at least one day not thinking of the situation. Oh, I know what it is like to have a toxic relationship engulf every fiber of your being. I also know that I have to finally let go. 

It's difficult to accept that someone whom you've trusted and loved could hurt you in such a way, but we learn a valuable lesson in dealing with such trials. We can endure. Yes, we can endure. We can move on. Remember that everyone, nothing lasts forever. Whatever we are going through, we will overcome it and it will leave us. We are never in a corner where we cannot escape or get out of. We will overcome. 

Have a Blessed day everyone.

P.S.
The Gratitude Challenge:
I am grateful for my little car. It works, it keeps me dry and gets me wherever I need to go. 


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