10 Years Later

                                                          Everyday is a brand new day, everyday
                                                           is a journey.



Earth gets its price for what it gives us;
The beggar is taxed for a corner to die in,
The priest has his fee who comes and shrives us,
We bargain for the graves we lie in;
At the devil's booth are all things sold,
Each ounce of dross costs its ounce of gold;
For a cap and bells our lives we pay,
Bubbles we buy with a whole soul's tasking;
'Tis heaven alone that is given away,'
Tis only God may be had for the asking.

--James Russell Lowell.

Can you believe it's been ten years since I've first been diagnosed with cancer? I never thought I would live this long. In fact, going beyond fifty seemed an impossibility. It was such a huge accomplishment for me. Now we're going for sixty!

When I think about that time in my life, it's very difficult for me to believe that person was me. My life is so different now, I'm so different now that I barely remember the old Lottie. Was I really like that? Did I really do those things? It's like looking at a movie of someone else's story. That just couldn't have been me, but it was.

Looking in the mirror can be difficult, almost painful at times, but it has to be done. I used to be such a planner. I had a five year plan. A ten year plan. An over forty plan. Nowadays, none of these plans exist, but one. Now, all I am looking toward is the retirement plan.

I have no idea what is in store for me in the coming years. I hope I can go on doing my Ministry work and writing this blog. Maybe even a new Ministry on the horizon? Who knows. Whatever it may be, I hope I am in acceptable health to do so. 

I don't need to know the future. I want to live in the here and now. When I was a young girl, I read my horoscope daily and often had my cards read in the hopes of knowing my future. That is the last thing on my mind nowadays. I will accept what comes my way with total submissive obedience. I will trust in Him. It's a little more exciting that way. 

Have a blessed day everyone.