Thursday, November 12, 2015

Throwback Thursday



                                         Everyday is a brand new day, everyday is a new journey.


It seems there is a pattern to my treatments. I become very tired and lack energy. Whoa, wait a minute, isn't that expected? Of course! The problem is with me. It makes no difference how bad my treatment may be, I still think I can maintain an active lifestyle. I continue to fill my plate until it's overflowing, believing I can do it all.

Not anymore. This time around, I'm taking it slow. Astonishingly, I'm not feeling guilty about not being productive. I am learning to relax and listen to my body.

O Wallow , Wallow
  I have to apologize for neglecting everyone...this blog ....my duties at home...my church . I have been wallowing in self-pity .  Have been laying in bed for three days ....sick .  This last chemo  took a lot more out of me than I can handle . I have one more to go in a month and I'm dreading it . This whole month has been dreadful for me . Something is going on inside of me . I'm sicker than usual : could feel despair setting in . Could it be because the end of chemo is near ?
  Reading one of my daily devotionals , I came across Joyce Meyer's , "The Importance Of
 Finishing". Here she says," there are a lot of people who step out and begin a  journey with God, but I don't think there are nearly as many who finish it".
  How will I finish my walk with God  in this journey? What is in store for me next? All I have been hearing is how I am almost done .....but there you all are wrong. This is not the end  but a beginning. It doesn't end with this last chemo. I don't get proclaimed brand new and go back to my old life. What should I do ? Where should I be ? I feel so out of place ...out of sorts . I can't even imagine going back to the old me .
 Do I continue on with this blog ? Does it end with my last treatment ? I don't know what to do .I feel like a dog that keeps going round in circles on his bed  until he finds that perfect spot and finally lays down . Where is my perfect spot ?

Have a blessed day everyone.

2 comments:

  1. Her article it is very interesting to read, I was delighted to read the article that you make,let alone there included photo. Thank you
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