Back and Forth I Go

I had many setbacks of various kinds or developed infections. Back to the hospital I'd go, and some of these trips were life threatening infections. Sometimes I stayed two weeks and other times three.
Excerpt from 90 Minutes In Heaven.


It's been awhile since I revisited one of my favorite books of all time ( 90 Minutes In Heaven ). This book has been so instrumental in the state of my well-being when I went through cancer the first time, that I've decided to revisit and view the book on a different level.

So let's get to it.

My recovery in the first four months, way back in 2007, also was slow with many infections and visits to the hospital. Unlike the author in the book, I wanted to have my recovery in the hospital. The last thing I wanted was to have to take care of myself.

I can distinctly remember my first nurse visit at home. She brought an IV stand along with a box of meds that I had to administer myself via the IV drip. As she demonstrated how to assemble the stand first and then how to care for my own pic line, I literally vomited from the nervousness. I couldn't believe they expected me to do all of that on my own.

When I was sent home with a hole in my belly and instructions to clean it with this huge Q-tip, peroxide and saline, they first had to call in my cancer counselor to help me mentally absorb the enormity of the situation.

These are just a few things, but there were many others I was expected to do myself for my recovery to happen. I wanted no part of it. I was perfectly happy having the professional staff of a hospital take care of me.

Looking back now, I can see why that had to happen. My cancer isn't a one time deal, it is a lifestyle. Learning how to take care of myself and the illness is a priority I needed to learn how to process and succeed in.

No longer could I exist and partake in the denial, I was forced to deal with it and I'm glad. I wouldn't be where I am at now if everyone did all for me.

That alone proves that no matter how scared we may be of something, once we overcome it , that feeling is totally priceless.

Have a Blessed day everyone.