Year Of The Whining

Time has a way of sneaking up on us when we least expect it . Summer is winding down and the new school year begins . Christmas a mere four months away . Where has the time gone ?

Looking back , I have to admit , this past year has not been my best shining moment . For someone who claims to be so good at     adaptation , I have done a lot of whining . 

When they eliminated my position , I felt a sense of freedom , long not experienced . Suddenly , I could take off work whenever I wanted  and for as long as I wanted . There was no one demanding my immediate attention nor looked to me for guidance . The feeling was liberating , indeed .

My attitude has undergone a drastic change as well . Gone is the accepting , cheek-turning woman  , wearing a smile . The halo cast aside , as the horns make an appearance and stay for awhile . There is no retreat to lick my wounds in private , my opinions have been known to those who need to hear them . 

As the days turned into weeks and then months , a side of me has emerged that hasn't been seen since childhood . I complained , I          yelled , argued and demanded . I whined and whined like a small child  needing a nap . I wanted all that I could not have . 

The year of the whining has begun . 

When the stress and demand became too much , I laid down my arms and took a break . The whining didn't cease , it was just done in 
private . 

This year , I have learned of my darker side . A side that I believed didn't  exist any longer . I have learned that we all can have our moments of shame  and shameful it has been for me . 

Have I truly tried to make things work ? Have I given it my all ? Or have I considered all of this a partial stopover to a better destination ? 

So the whining ensued over and over again . It's a good thing the year is almost over . . .. this year of the whining . 

Have a Blessed day everyone .