A memory without a blot
or contamination must be
an inexhaustible source of
pure refreshment.
—Charlotte Brontë.
Social media has exploded with images of couples living their best lives ever, mostly on Valentine's Day. What young girl wouldn't be a bit envious, especially if she is waiting on her Prince Charming. For a long time, Valentines Day has been a very difficult day in our home. For many young girls it can be a day full of anxiety and envy over their own futures. They watch as couples give each other exuberant gifts of love. When will it happen to them? We never cared for Valentine Day for that reason alone. We all want to feel special and loved, don't we? To all the young girls waiting for their loves, I hope you read the following. I so felt this author's pain as she reflected on all her years of wanting her own flowers from her very own Valentine. Enjoy.
If You Don’t Get Flowers Today
SARAH GERINGER
Listen to this devotion
“It is better to take refuge in the LORD than to trust in people.” Psalm 118:8 (NLT)
I carefully lifted my windshield wiper to retrieve the frozen pink rose that cold Valentine’s Day years ago. A freshman in college, I had stopped by my car to eat a snack between my morning classes and excitedly wondered who sent me this surprise. My heart pounded in anticipation.
Starting up the engine for warmth, I rubbed my palms together before opening the attached card. The rose was from … my mom. Her words in the card were kind and encouraging. So why did I still feel empty inside?
The truth was, I wished the rose was from a secret admirer. A young man, not my mom. Since my last date had been an embarrassing dud, spaced far after the previous one, I longed for a new romance to fill me up. My guilt and loneliness combined into a frustrating mixture.
I felt like a cup with no bottom.
No matter what I put inside the cup, I didn’t feel full. Roses, chocolate, books, TV shows, fantasies and even relationships couldn’t fill it. Loneliness seemed to be the only thing filling that bottomless space, and I was weary of its constant, haunting presence.
My parents divorced when I was 4 years old, and the day my daddy left was the day loneliness took up permanent residence in my heart and mind. Though I wished it would go away, I had no power to push it out the door. Loneliness lingered every time I craved love and attention that was in such short supply.
Then in high school, I developed resentment over the flowers and gifts I saw lined up in the cafeteria every February 14. None of them were for me. I believed the devil’s whispered lie — None of them will ever be for you. You’ll always be lonely.
About 15 years after that frozen-rose morning, I sat in a counselor’s office. After listening to my stories of constant loneliness, he observed, “Relationships are very important to you, aren’t they?” His simple, judgment-free question was a pivotal point in my spiritual journey.
Have a blessed day everyone.
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