Revisiting An Old Friend

                                                  Everyday is a brand new day,

                                                  everyday is a journey.

We would fill the hours with the sweetest things,

If we had but a day:
We should drink alone at the purest springs,
In our upward way:
We should guide our wayward or wearied will,
By the clearest light:
We should keep our eyes on the heavenly hills,
If they lay in sight:
We should be from our clamorous selves set free,
To work and pray:
And be what the Father would have us to be,
If we had but a day.

--Margaret E. Sangster.

I've been missing my old friend, Linda. Somehow, I never thought she would die ahead of me. We began cancer together and I thought we would go out the same way. I didn't expect her to die and now I miss her very much. 

When things are uncertain and scary, we surround ourselves with the good ole friendships that we know will love us no matter what happens. Linda loved me, this I knew for sure. I knew that even when I would see her, there would be a smile on her face. It was given. She always had a smile for me and yet I know she suffered from depression. There were times when I called and she would slam the phone down. I knew that she needed to be alone at that time. 

That's why it is doubly hard for me to understand Allison. Nothing in my journey with cancer shocks me anymore. I have encountered all types of people and no matter how mad they may have been, they welcomed me into their circle. Deep down inside, they wanted and needed someone to hold their hand or listen to their story. Allison wants neither.

I have held many friendships with fellow cancer survivors and warriors. This is nothing new for me. I enjoy being part of that select clique that only we cancer people can understand. I wish I had a larger circle to call friend. Don't mind me, I'm just missing my old friend Linda. Missing our time together. Missing her.

Have a blessed day everyone.