Wednesday, December 9, 2015

More Questions

                                                 Everyday is a brand new day, everyday
                                                  is a journey.

People are really curious and full of questions regarding my cancer. I often wondered why. At first, I thought because I have a woman's cancer (ovarian) and it is a silent killer that has no symptoms to distinguish it.Then I thought that maybe because of my appearance/attitude. I mean, I don't look like I have an illness.

1. How  are you doing emotionally regarding your cancer?
You know, I've been thinking about this all morning. I've come so far, it's been 8 years now, that I don't even think about the cancer. It's become a part of me, like an arm or a leg. When I'm out of remission, I'm not screaming I have cancer!!!!! It's more like Oh, I have a cold. I don't allow it to take over my whole being. I mean, it's my 4th re-occurrence.

I believe it's all about acceptance and quality of life. My faith is very strong so death is not something I'm afraid of happening. Maybe just the process, but otherwise, I have come to terms with death. As to my emotional state, I want to live my life and not spend it crying about something that I cannot control. This is my basket of lemons. Now, let me see what I can do with all of them.

2. Are you still working?
This seems to be asked in total amazement and I have no idea why. Isn't the whole point of preventive medicine and quality of life to live as normally as possible? Why should I stop working? Because I have cancer? Everyone thinks I should go on disability, but to me, I want to be as normal as I can. There will come a time when I won't be able to work full time or even part time. Until then, I'm not going anywhere. 

3. How can we help someone who has cancer?
First of all, is this their first time with cancer? Or a re-occurrence? If their first time, I suggest they have a chemo partner, someone who can take them to doctor appointments and treatments. This is all new to them and I know from my own experience, it is a huge comfort to have someone take care of the minor details like prescriptions, lunches, and driving.

Another way to help would be by providing a meal during the treatment days. This way, all they have to worry about is taking care of themselves like sleeping and resting. 

Ask them if there are any errands that need to be made like grocery shopping, picking up children from school, or perhaps dry cleaning.

Maybe you could do their laundry, clean their house, cut their grass. Any of these things would be a great help. Anything that can help eliminate the daily chores so they can rest. 

One thing I want to clarify and I need to say it gently as to not hurt anyone's feelings. Visitation is great, because we all need to know we are loved, but we have to know when to go home and just how often to visit. Remember, the person just had treatment and their bodies will be exhausted. Even though I work, by the time my shift is over, I'm done. I'm so tired that I cannot wait to get home. 

I hope this will help answer some of those questions. Have a blessed day everyone.

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Puzzles my mom made for me!