My Roots

When I saw my mom walk into her surprise 70th birthday party , I got all choked up . This was certainly a milestone . The chances of me reaching that same age are very slim . I want to have my very own set of roots . I want to be the roots of my own family .

I believe that is why I have been  experiencing this disconnect at family holidays . This something that feels absent  . . . . missing  . . . from my life . I want to see myself in the faces of my future grandchildren . Their mannerisms reflecting generation after generation of my roots .

Even with Hannah and Timothy , although not blood , traditions can be passed on . A renewal of my favorite hobbies and talents can be taught . Knowledge and stories can be told and remembered . Not to mention the hugs and kisses that can be shared .

I want to spend my Holidays surrounded by my children and grandchildren . I want to see them bicker and drive their parents crazy . I want to see them advance from one stage to another . I want to see them grow up .

Yeah , I want my own family tree and I want to live to see it .