The 100 Day Project: Day 14 Of Writing

                                                   Everyday is a brand new day, everyday is a journey.




Sweet is the smile of home; 
the mutual look
When hearts are of each other sure;
Sweet all the joys that crowd the household nook,
The haunt of all affections pure.
J. KEBLE.

I woke up to the to the sounds of birds chirping. The sounds of Spring! I could hear them so distinctly, because my bedroom window was opened. The temperatures have been up and down all week, but today it was in the 60's. Just two days ago we had snow falling all night and all day. Crazy weather for sure!

I laid there listening to all the sounds of early morning. The birds singing, the people coming and going, the train blowing it's whistle in the distance. Yet somehow, it felt peaceful. I definitely didn't want to get up out of bed. 

These past four months of the New Year have been one of my most stressful. Or should I say, frustrating? Nothing and I mean nothing, gets done on the first try nor the second. The pension is still in process of being transferred into an IRA. The insurance, well that's another issue. Even the cable people won't leave me alone, calling me relentlessly trying to make a deal. I don't want the cable! 

Just let me lay here and bask in the quiet of the morning. 

I used to be so good at handling worry or at least, a little better at it. So why not now? Well, this is certainly uncharted waters for me. I am not educated in the ways of stocks and bonds. Or last Will and Testaments. Or many of these documents that I need to take care of . . . finally.

I want a balcony or a little patio where I can sit on in peace and quiet. That is something that Emily and I have always wanted. Just a wee bit of private outdoor space. Maybe it's time to just go and leave this concrete world behind. As I drove to visit my niece last weekend, I thought to myself as I looked around my surroundings: There are no trees here or woods. Just a whole bunch of concrete. 

Perhaps, there is a change coming and my heart can feel it? Sometimes, our hearts don't quite meet up with our brains. There is a bit of restlessness, uncertainty and a bit of fear involved in case of the unknown. Right now, I'm just glad I can hear the birds sing to me every morning. Sing on, sing on.

Have a blessed day everyone. 

The 100 Day Project: Day 13 Of Writing

                                                                     Everyday is a brand new day,
                                                                    everyday is a journey.


I will shun no toil or woe,
Where Thou leadest I will go,
Be my pathway plain or rough;
If but every hour may be
Spent in work that pleases Thee,
Ah, dear Lord, it is enough!
G. TERSTEEGEN




I like making lists. It helps me be more prepared in what is coming and organization settles me. I become centered on what I need on that list instead of the commotion around me. I don't over buy or overdo anything unnecessary. I love lists because they provide clarity and simplicity in a chaotic world. My mind can be muddled, but the list isn't. 

I also save every receipt, bill, documentation and actually have a huge manila envelope that I store it in for the entire year. At the end of that year, I go through it and save only the very important paperwork. I am glad in doing so, because it can become quite useful at times.

For instance, take today. The mail comes so I sit down to examine what has arrived. There were quite a few envelopes and one in particular caught my eye. It was the cable company. I was a bit puzzled, because we cancelled our account a few weeks earlier and even sent back all the equipment. I have all the receipts and confirmation numbers to prove it. 

They sent me a bill for the upcoming month. First of all, we don't even have cable anymore let alone the equipment to watch it. I called them, actually three times, because they kept redirecting me over and over again. You can imagine the frustration building in me with each redirection. Long story short, I eventually fixed the problem, but it wasn't easy. Again, they kept asking me why I cancelled. How many times are you going to ask me? I guess, it's inconceivable for them to think anyone would do so. 

Life seems to be more chaotic than ever with all these forces coming at us from all directions. I detest having to be on the phone about these types of issues, but I have noticed them to be more and more. Another envelope that came in today's mail was from Emily's old Union. That was another issue that had to be resolved. She left that job on December 1, 2018 and they were still charging her dues. Do you see what I mean? 

Here's another good example of why keeping lists and important documents on hand. Save those receipts and try to keep good records, along with good lists. Organization saves many, many incidents from escalating even more. 

Have a blessed day everyone. 

The 100 Day Project: Day 12 Of Writing

                                                 Everyday is a brand new day, everyday is a journey. 


Drop Thy still dews of quietness,
Till all our strivings cease;
Take from our souls the strain and stress,
And let our ordered lives confess
The beauty of Thy peace.
J. G. WHITTIER.

It snowed yesterday. It began as rain, then sleet and finally, a heavy snow. Every single time I looked out the window, it was worse than before. It just snowed and snowed and snowed right in the middle of April, a mere week before Easter. That was a first for me. I have seen many types of cold spells for Easter, but never snow. 

It just shows you how little control we truly have on this Earth. Life happens whether we are ready for it or not. Which brings me to my cancer anniversary that is coming up. I've been thinking this weekend about that moment when it does come back. First, I want to say that I have made my peace with my diagnosis of cancer being in my life forever. Yet, the longer we stay in remission, the harder it is when it does come back. The longest remission for me was 4 1/2 years and right now, I'm at 2 1/2 years.

That may sound weird to you, but look at it from my perspective. The longer the cancer lays dormant, the more we live our life as normal. We soon begin to forget what it was like for us. We can easily become complacent about oncology appointments or Ct. scans or blood work or regular doctor routines. Cancer treatments have a way of keeping us vigilant about these things.

None of us know what will happen in the next moment let alone a month or even a year. We may have a small inkling, but never truly the reality. Who knows? I may be free from cancer forever or it could come back at my next appointment. The point here is that this upcoming anniversary is a very important one for me in many ways. I do have something planned for it so you'll just have to wait and see. Consider this a sneak preview, lol.

Have a blessed day everyone. 

The 100 Day Project: Day 11 Of Writing

                                              Everyday is a brand new day, everyday is a journey. 


Not by the terrors of a slave
God's sons perform His will,
But with the noblest powers they have
His sweet commands fulfil.
ISAAC WATTS.


It's funny how a small change can lift one's spirits. One can rearrange the furniture in a room or change the curtains. Suddenly, it feels new and exciting. I've been thinking along those lines in reference to my bedroom.

My bedroom has always been more than just a place to sleep at night. It has always held a multi-purpose. Even when my children were babies, it was a nursery for awhile. As they grew, so did the purpose of my bedroom. When they were in school, it held all the materials I needed to be on the PTA board and a Den Mother. Everything was stored there in the corner of the room.

Children grew even older and became tweens and teenagers, I had a nice little second job working from home. There were plenty of Post Office bins stacked high next to my desk and computer. I loved that second job, but alas, it ended after a year. 

Now, my bedroom has taken on even more purpose. Three, in fact: I sleep there, I write my blog, Ministry work and supplies. My Ministry has really exploded and suddenly I'm running out of room. It has been five years already since we have begun, it's only natural for us to grow. 

I think it's time to redecorate or redesign this space so it can work for me a little better. There are several stains and smudges that need to be painted over, hopefully in a different color. Right now, it's a mustard color of sort and I'm thinking along the lines of a light mocha or tan. Maybe even rearrange the furniture. Who knows? Either way, this should be my next purge project of 2019. Let's see where it will take us.

Have a blessed day everyone. 

The 100 Day Project: Day 10 Of Writing

                                                   Everyday is a brand new day, everyday is a journey.



With grateful hearts the past we own;
  The future, all to us unknown,
  We to Thy guardian care commit,
  And peaceful leave before Thy feet.
P. DODDRIDGE.

The day began well, really well. Emily was off from work, so we both got up early. By 9 a.m., two loads of laundry was done and a supper of polenta lasagna sat on the stove ready for later. The kitchen cleanup took mere minutes when two pairs of hands are working together. 

It's funny how on some days we can accomplish so much more than the usual routine. If only that could happen on a regular basis, but alas, our bodies and minds are made a bit differently. We wander. We can't help it really. 

That was my morning. Here I am at work and there is nothing to do . . . . again. For the past several weeks it has been incredibly slow. I have tried to occupy myself as best as I can by cleaning out my draws and my mobile cart. When that was done, I walked the packaging floor collecting plastic liner bags for my homeless mats. Already my little HHR is loaded with several huge bags of them and my room has at least three or four. Plenty of material for my mats! That was last week. Now What?

Again, my mind began to wander to places and things it shouldn't. Remember what they say about idle hands? Well, it's the same for the mind. It's extremely difficult to appear busy when one is not. So the mind wanders and  mostly we seem to remember the bad moments. The accusations. The separations. The arguments. The guilt and the hurt lay heavily on our idle mind.

We like to revert to the past, don't we? No matter how much we like to deny it and proclaim how modern we are by moving forward. We are so much better than the people who have hurt us, yet in moments such as these, we go there. We go back revisiting the hurt. Idle minds and idle hands are truly the devil's work, make no mistake about that. 

So I've been fighting it. Resisting these thoughts all because I have nothing to do on these slow days at work. It's funny, because at home I am so busy and the opposite is true at work. So I've been keeping as busy as I can visiting other co-workers, making lists or plans for future projects. I don't want to dwell in those bad moments. Don't go there, just keep moving, one step at a time. 

Have a blessed day everyone. 

The 100 Day Project: Day 9 Of Writing

                                                                  Everyday is a brand new day,
                                                                  everyday is a journey.


Not as the conqueror comes,
They, the true-hearted, came;
Not with the roll of the stirring drums,
And the trumpet songs of fame:
Amidst the storm they sang,
And the stars heard and the sea;
And the sounding aisles of the dim woods rang
To the anthem of the free.
Ay, call it holy ground,
The soil where first they trod;
They have left unstained what there they found—
Freedom to worship God.
—Felicia D. Hemans.

Why does the weekend always fly by? I mean, I had such high hopes and instead, only half came through. I wonder if I hadn't slept in on Saturday last weekend, would I have had accomplished a bit more? Probably, but then, I need sleep way more than anything else.

Here we are a whole week later and it doesn't seem like this upcoming weekend will be any different. First of all, how did Easter sneak up on me so fast? I thought it was weeks away, but alas, Sunday is Palm Sunday already. Now, I'm really freaking out!

One week left before Easter and I haven't even thought of Easter. It was almost upon us. When? How? Tomorrow, I have to post a vlog on my YouTube for a giveaway I was doing. Time to announce the winner. Afterwards, I'm heading out to visit my niece Katherine, who is having a Girl's Party in the afternoon. By the time I get home, it will be evening. the whole day would have been gone. At least, I will be bringing with me her blanket. If you want to see the story behind that blanket, I did do a YouTube vlog all about it. I'm a bit anxious whether she will like it or not. She is crochet worthy.

The rest of the weekend, I need to take care of two things for sure. One, my bedroom once again has been hit by a tsunami. Actually, a couple of them. I would be horrified if anyone saw it. There is so much stuff there, mostly Ministry related, that there is a small path leading from the door to my desk where I can work from. I really need to redo this room somehow so it can work for me. It seems that the Ministry is exploding big time, which is good. I need more room.

Two, I need to finish my mom's blanket. Originally, I wanted to surprise her since she was going away for about 8 days to visit her friend in Indiana. I wanted to finish it and leave it on the couch so when she walked back into her apartment, she would see it first thing. A nice surprise. Now, I'm not sure if I can do it. She is coming back this Sunday afternoon. I will definitely do my very best. 

So much to do and not enough time to do it. I feel like we are rushing through these Holidays without fully enjoying what they represent. We are so busy being busy in preparation for them, that we don't truly experience them. We need to slow down. I need to slow down. 

HAVE A blessed day everyone. 

The 100 Day Project: Day 8 Of Writing

                                                                 Everyday is a brand new day,
                                                                   everyday is a journey.


Let thy day be to the night
A letter of good tidings! Let thy praise
Go up as birds go up--that when they awake,
Shake off the dew and soar.
--Jean Ingelow.

Sometimes, I want to find a small house like the one above and just plain hide from everyone. I guess I live an Imaginary Life within my head. When life becomes too much, I daydream about that life. I can see it clearly in my mind. The furnishings, the color of the walls and the layout of the cottage vividly can be seen. I can see myself going about my everyday life according to me.

This week has been difficult to say the least. At least, at work. Every job has the same type of people in it. You have the troublemakers who like to stir up things between others. Then you have the ones who are always miserable and take it out on others. Then there are the ones who get along with everyone and try to keep the peace. Well, the troublemaker's and the miserable's have really kicked up a storm at work this week. 

I'm tired emotionally and I need to retreat into that secluded cabin above. Have you ever felt like that? I have, but honestly, I think we all have a secret imaginary life. Some of us escape by reading and others by playing videos games where they save the world. Some even watch movies and pretend they are the hero or heroine. We all have ways of escaping into these secret worlds of ours. 

There's nothing wrong with it unless we forget what is reality and what is fantasy. There are people who escape into the imaginary and never come back out. That can be very scary. Don't fall into that trap. Another escape is living in the past, romanticizing something that is not. That's even scarier. Believe me, the past is the past for a reason. Don't live there.

What do you escape to? What is your imaginary life like? Can you escape back into reality when you're done? I certainly hope so.

HAVE a blessed day everyone.