Just Being Still

                                Everyday is a brand new day, everyday is a journey.

 When thou hast thanked thy God

For every blessing sent,
What time will then remain
For murmurs or lament?
R. C. TRENCH

These past several months have been reflective to say the least. My mind has been working on overtime, analyzing, weighing in objectives and assessing situations. I would mull things over repeating the whole process all again several times. Thinking, analyzing, weighing in, assessing. Reflection can be exhausting!

As the New Year began, my desire for stillness, serenity and silence came to the forefront. I long for all three. I know that we as Christians are taught to be in fellowship with one  another. We are taught to share confidences and experiences with each other. We are to encourage, pray for and keep each other grounded in the truth of God's Word. I know all that in my heart, but sometimes, being alone with God is what we need more.

I want the quiet time, away from the world, where I can hear Him whisper inside my heart. There are so many distractions out there that can sway my attention to the over scheduled calendar and appointments. People's attitudes can hurt your soul and weariness can set in. One has a desire to walk away from the chaos and all it represents. I wince upon scrolling on social media.

O, weary heart, where can you rest?

Be still and know I am God.

Be still.

Be.

The world can be such a weary place and we can become heavy ladened with all the cares that exist within it. We can easily lose our truth in who we are in Jesus Christ. There are so many angry, unforgiving and hurtful people out there. It can be overwhelming to show light in a darkened world.

Whenever I find life draining and exhausting, I retreat into the stillness of my sanctuary, my home. I have always felt one's home should be the most peaceful place on Earth. A place where we can be ourselves.

Just like the ravens that fed Elijah in the cave while he rested, I surround myself in the Word of God. The Lord restores, rejuvenates all who seek Him.  He does not fail. He leaves the 99 and goes after that one who needs Him the most at any given time. He will lift us up and carry us when we cannot. He is the Lord, our Savior. He is our Father. He is healer of my soul.

Have a blessed day everyone.

Finding The Right Words

 

                                  Everyday is a brand new day, everyday is a journey.

Long though my task may be,

Cometh the end.
God't is that helpeth me,
His is the work, and He
New strength will lend.
ANON.

This blog began many years ago. It seems hard to believe that it's been twelve years since that first entry back in 2011. I honestly thought I was dying and needed to leave something behind for my children. My cancer had come back for the second time and I couldn't imagine surviving it again.

Little did I know that God had a plan for me. I'm still here, four-time cancer survivor, still plugging away. 

I wrote almost everyday for years about my experiences with cancer and my emotions. I didn't leave anything out. I went in and out of remission until finally I just stayed there. I have been cancer free now for 7 1/2 years! That, my friends, is a miracle!

For someone who has spent all these years going back and forth to the oncologist every three months, these past three years have been a dream. Three years ago, I received the best check up results of my life. I, no longer needed to go, but once a year. 

It also left me with a loss for words. What do I write about now? I would sit down and stare at a blank screen and no words came. Instead, emptiness and silence. It's as if I couldn't think of being anything other than a cancer patient. Who am I now? What do I have to offer someone on these pages? 

There is a part of me that wants to finish all the loose ends, the unwritten stories, the drafts laying hidden among the dust balls. The need to write about all the things one couldn't say before, the hard things and some messy ones as well. Once that is all done, where do we go from here?

This blog has been my steadfast journal of a journey I never asked for nor wanted. It happened and served a huge purpose not only in my life, but hopefully in yours, too. Writing still hasn't come easy as before. There have been times where no words could be expressed. I went fishing deep, deep inside and came up empty trying to find the right words.

I have no idea what will happen when all the drafts are done. Will it be time to turn off the laptop once for all? Only time will tell.

Have a blessed day everyone.